If you and your significant other want to get sober and need help, you may find it beneficial to explore addiction recovery and sober living together. While most sober living facilities are either sober living homes for men or women, exploring programs at the same time has its benefits.
In this article, we’re exploring how sober living for couples can help you during your journey to addiction recovery.
Sober Living for Couples
For many years it was widely thought to be a mistake to have couples attend addiction treatment programs together. If a couple suffered from addiction, each partner would be sent to separate facilities to work on themselves, then sent back home to their partner.
This approach did not always work. One spouse may leave treatment early while the other stays for an extended period, putting them at different stages in their recovery.
It is very hard for a person to stay sober when their partner is still using. Their partner becomes one of their biggest triggers that lead to relapse.
Today, couples are encouraged by many treatment facilities to attend and get sober together. There are also many sober living facilities offering a safe environment in between the time a couple leaves inpatient treatment and returns home.
1. Safe Environment
A safe environment means much more than being anti-violent. For couples in recovery, it means a place without interferences from friends or family members who are still using drugs. It can mean a place where drug dealers can’t just drop by when they have a new batch of the latest drug.
Couples need to know what it feels like to live in a supportive, sober home environment. This will give them a basis for what to strive for when they do return home. It may even encourage them to move to a new location and start fresh.
2. Eases Loneliness
Going to treatment is hard. There can be many weeks between detox, inpatient treatment, sober living and back home. During this time, those in recovery may experience a wide range of emotions, including loneliness and missing their partner.
When couples attend rehab together, they can fill that loneliness void. Just being able to talk to someone in person, or hug the one you love, can help someone choose to stay and thrive in sober living.
3. Avoid Temptation of Leaving Too Soon
Just because someone is in treatment and getting sober, they are not free of temptations. They have succeeded and made it to sober living but if they are in a relationship with someone who is still using, this person can be tempted to leave treatment and return to their old lifestyle.
Bringing that loved one to sober living takes away that urge to give up. There is more freedom in sober living. This means there are more temptations. Having support from a partner is beneficial in fighting those urges.
4. Encourage One Another
Sure, some couples may go to treatment and after a few days encourage the other to leave and relapse. This can work the opposite way too. When one couple wants to leave treatment, the other can talk them into staying.
They can also work with counselors to develop treatment plans that include activities that help the couple encourage continued stay.
5. On the Same Page After Discharge
Attending sober living together means the couple has already chosen to detox and complete inpatient treatment together. They are on the same page versus one person getting sober while the others continue to use.
Couples need to be on the same page when they are discharged from sober living and return to their life. Being on the same page helps them stay united in the fight against relapse.
6. Gives Both Time to Practice Living Sober
Sober living is the place a person can practice living without using drugs. Prior to treatment, an addict is high all the time, like when they brush their teeth, eat, drive, and spend time with family.
They now must learn to do all those same things but without being high.
Learning to do this at the same time is great. Taking time to practice living sober together gives them a an even better chance of success.
7. Learn Relationship Skills
In treatment, even in sober living, couples will have multiple opportunities to learn relationship skills they can apply in their life.
An addicted couple has lost the ability give their relationship what it needs to survive. Addiction is a very selfish disease. The only focus is to satisfy personal cravings. One sided relationships do not work.
Sober living is the perfect place to start implementing the tools you were taught in treatment for making your relationship work. You are also given opportunities to work on yourself too.
8. Can Work on Self
You cannot be the best partner until you become the best you. Meaning, if you are not healthy, you are not able to give 100% to your relationship.
While in treatment together, you and your partner can work on relationship healing together, while also working with counselors individually. Individual therapy is available even while you are in sober living. It’s encouraged that you continue working with counselors even after you leave inpatient treatment.
Individual therapy can help you learn who you really are when you are sober. What you learn can be applied to make your relationship better.
9. Learn Boundaries Together
Healthy boundaries must be set by both persons in a relationship for them to remain sober. Being able to say “no”, spending time alone, avoiding enabling and codependent behaviors are a few of the ways establishing healthy boundaries can help your relationship.
In sober living, you can work on boundaries together. You will be able to grow your self-esteem, take responsibility for your own actions, and show respect for the person you love.
The boundaries you learn to set will also need to be put into place when you return home. Setting personal boundaries at home will include family and friends who may mean well but are a trigger for relapse.
While in sober living, you and your partner can develop a plan on how you will set these boundaries. You can even start implementing them before you return home.
In conclusion, sober living for couples offers many great benefits for the relationship and for each of you as individuals. Attending sober living together shows you value your relationship and are serious about getting help together.